couples counseling, marriage counseling, parent counseling. serving austin, tx and beyond.
Has Your Marriage Been On The Back-Burner For Far Too Long?
- Do you feel like your relationship is more about work and logistics than love, friendship, and intimacy?
- Are you arguing about parenting and housework more than you want to?
- Are you growing to resent each other because your needs aren't being met?
- Do you worry about the impact your relationship is having on your children?
Marriage is hard for everyone because it's about growth and change and being vulnerable together even when you want to run away. Add children into the equation, and often the stress feels like more than your relationship can handle. All of the childcare, financial, and household demands make it easy to drift apart from the one person who you need the most - your partner. Just when you both need to rely on each other for comfort, support, and pleasure, you can fall into the habit of being adversaries and sources of stress and conflict.
Over time, you might become complacent and accept that your relationship has lost its spark and the emotional closeness you used to rely upon. Or maybe you've come to argue and fight on a regular basis, and there's a lot of tension in your home. One way or the other, you're missing the warmth, compassion, pleasure, and intimacy you wanted in your marriage. And now, as parents, it's even more important to do the hard work of reconnecting and rekindling the loving marriage you want - for your own sake, and for your children's.
parenthood is hard for every couple
69% of new parents report a significant decrease in relationship satisfaction within the first 3 years of parenthood. Most of us fear that something is wrong with us or our marriage if we're struggling, but the truth is, we all struggle to adapt to a new way of being a couple. Together, you need to learn how to shift from a family of two, to a family of three or four or more. The dynamics change, and it's easy to let the kids become the focus and lose sight of each other.
Research also shows that regular conflict and hostility between parents creates harmful levels of stress in children, that can affect their learning, peer relationships, and overall well-being. Most parents fight about housework and childcare, particularly about who's doing how much and what's fair or unfair. Parents also struggle with the changes in how much sex and physical intimacy they're having. Parents also fight about parenting decisions like discipline, feeding, sleep, chores - you name it. Parenthood involves so many decisions, and each decision requires you and your partner to show up, work together, and support one another. There are opportunities for conflict and hurt feelings around every corner!
Parenthood poses a huge challenge for couples, but fortunately, with the help of a compassionate, experienced, practical therapist you can get back to feeling connected, in love, and fulfilled in your relationship.
couples COUNSELING TAILOR-MADE FOR PARENTs like you
All parent couples struggle at some point, and I am uniquely trained in applying The Gottman Method to help parents move from conflict and distance to friendship and support. I have dealt with many of the issues couples face both personally and professionally. Whether you are struggling with co-parenting, sexual intimacy, or negative communication styles, couples counseling can help you find concrete, doable strategies to work together more effectively and lovingly.
Couples who apply the skills learned in marriage counseling experience greater relationship satisfaction, less conflict, more cooperative co-parenting, and more positive interactions with their kids.
In our sessions, each of you will have the opportunity to meet with me individually and speak honestly about your struggles, fears, and wishes. Each of you must believe you can grow and must commit to bringing your best, most courageous self to the relationship and our work together.
Together, we will examine your everyday challenges and understand the moments when you disconnect, become defensive, or turn against each other. Both of you will bring to the sessions a willingness to find solutions, be vulnerable, ask for what you need, and keep the bigger picture in focus - a happy, healthy marriage and family. With weekly 'homework' assignments and access to me for coaching between sessions, the results can be fast and powerful.
By committing to a short-term, solution-focused period of couples counseling, it is possible for you to develop a deeper, more compassionate, and more supportive love for each other. You and your partner can parent like a team, work through disagreements, and rekindle the friendship and intimacy you lost. You can give your children the gift of happy parents who show them what true love looks like.
Frequently asked questions
We are both Super busy, how much time with this take?
- I work with clients who are motivated and ready to take action, because I want you to see results quickly. Couples typically meet with me for 4-6 weeks in a row, and then we can move to every other week or monthly depending on the improvements you're seeing. Expect to work hard within the session, but most importantly, you will need to dedicate small amounts of time each day to enjoy each other and communicate in order to see the results you want.
Money is tight, isn't couples counseling expensive?
- Investing in couples counseling that helps you prevent conflict, co-parent effectively, and rekindle the love in your relationship is priceless. My fees are $225 for a 75 minute sessions and $175 for 50 minute sessions, and definitely get your money's worth! Of course, I never want anyone to go into a financial crisis in order to work together, and am happy to offer referrals to lower fee therapists.
I want counseling, but my partner doesn't. What should I do?
- I work with couples only when both partners are willing to grow, change, and connect. I meet with each partner individually so you have a chance to share your perspective with me privately, and also so each of you come into couples sessions with your own, personal motivation clearly defined. If your partner is unwilling, you may consider individual counseling with me.
We don't live in Austin, can we still work with you?
- Yes! I work with couples from around the world via phone or secure video chat. Remote counseling is only appropriate for clients who are not experiencing a crisis or high amounts of conflict in their relationship, and who have the motivation to commit to the work without the intimacy of in person sessions.
"We were hesitant at first but right away Dr. Jessica made us both feel completely comfortable and like the problems we were facing were normal! Just having that time each week to sit with each other and know that we were committed to making things better felt really good. Dr. Jessica was so down to earth and completely understood the realities of trying to have a marriage with small children around all the time. She helped find small, simple, playful ways of connecting each day. Now, when we're disagreeing, we know exactly what to do to work through it productively. It has been such a gift to our our family." - R & H
"Jessica put us as ease right away by helping us see that the problem wasn't with each other, but that we were in a really stressful situation, with a ton of work to do each day, and needed to figure out how to help each other instead of put more stress on our shoulders. We reconnected with why we chose each other in the first place, and got on the same page about how we want to handle some of the parenting struggles we're dealing with. We loved that we could always be completely honest and Jessica would never make us feel ashamed about messing up, she was always compassionate and helped us keep a sense of humor. Thank you!"- E & S
*All testimonials shared with permission and anonymously to protect client confidentiality.